I did feel a little better, however my goodness talk about getting a 'rain check'. I had a few lessons that just appeared!!! Firstly I heard that someone I really care about has just found out that she has to have 15 months of chemotherapy - um. You can guess that immediately it put things into perspective. Then I heard about someones history and was shocked what they had experience and who they were despite, because of this.
At this point I really was suddenly not thinking about me and how I was feeling and was so in gratitude for my health and my life, immediately and in awe of the human spirit for both of these people.
I did plod on and do some things I needed to do. I also definitely employed - that what I did was good enough and it is. I then met a friend to celebrate her birthday at 6 pm. Honestly being distracted and especially with someone you care about, really, really worked, instantly. All these messages are telling me so much. The place we initially planned to go to was closed as was many in Whangarei on a Sunday evening - haha. We ended up going to an Indian Restaurant called Shiraz, which was lovely. Really enjoyed it.
We then went to the 'Old Library' to see a play. I was not sure what it was about. It was called The Intricacies of Caring'. It was excellent. 2 young men played all the characters. Basically they were young men who spent time in the each one's bedroom, drinking, smoking and just really wasting away. A friend of theirs commits suicide at 21 and this starts to change things for them.
They go on a kind of road trip in NZ to a place called Jerusalem and it is about their explorations of life, each other and their family. Honestly. I so needed reminded to listen and hear the messages. I had a lovely evening and felt blessed to be there.
When I got home I could not believe that I had so many messages that reminded me about what really matters and whilst I do not want to discount the gremlins, inner critics as they do have an impact, I was totally surprised how quickly I could change not only what I was thinking but also how I felt when I heard about the others, which demonstrates that I have that capacity.
I am not sure what I am trying to say here because I totally believe in compassion, experiencing all our emotions and hands up to this being a working progress, but I guess it is about really listening to what works for us and doing that. My previous attempts was to still work through what I was doing, which initially was the structure, process and paperwork for coaching, plodding on and I kept having the thought, 'man I really seem to be in the depths today, but I am not going to let it stop me.'
Sometimes I think I can think too much and some of these thoughts could be habit. I do believe they are around because I am stepping up and love my life so much and allow myself to express who I am in my coaching even more and in general, so this can get challenged, which means I am on track. Having said that perspective really did make a difference and having a distraction was amazing, whether that be creativity, activity, someone else's incredible story, predicament, what ever it is, can so help also.
Don't you just love that we all just keep learning. I meet amazing people and I am sure we all do and honestly it really does remind me what being human really means. We are so powerful, more than we can imagine and yet most of us still play it small. We are incredible.
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