Blaming - Self Acknowledgement

I am learning about writing blogs and so will be changing formats.  I am beginning to understand that some people like to read lots of narratives and others don’t.  So here goes, this time I am going to use more bullet points and see what happens.  I really want the blogs to be informative, useful, and authentic.   The basis of my coaching is Kaizen Muse Creativity Coaching ®.  I will be using terminology/tools that are based on this approach and whatever I think will work.

Blaming – Self Acknowledgment

Interesting Stuff!

·        If you feel frustrated and annoyed at someone, just check out that you are not feeling this way because they have not behaved in a way that you wanted.

·        Some times we seek acknowledgement from others to validate what we have done or how well we are doing.  If we don’t receive this then we can feel frustrated or annoyed at a person without realizing why.  It is not their fault, they have done nothing wrong.

·        If you are doing this, firstly please have compassion for yourself and know that you are doing the best that you can but now you have raised awareness.  This is a starting point.

·        Often the people we seek acknowledgement from we presume that ‘they have everything together or on to it’ and therefore, not human and don’t have human needs, just like the rest of us.


Ta Da! Successes

Congratulations that you are still reading this.

How about you think about one thing that you have acknowledged yourself for?  If this is hard to do consider a small small thing, it may be that you got out of bed today, made a yummy meal, turned up for work on time, played with the kids, did something creative for you, even if it was colouring in. 

o   If you can, how did that feel?

o   Where in the body can you feel that feeling?  If that is hard to do, just imagine where you might feel it in your body?

o   Notice the difference.


You get To (if you feel like it)

• notice who you have recently been angry with and just briefly explore if that was because you wanted them to validate you and say that you did a good job or that you are a neat person.
• congratulate
• make up a phrase or affirmation that is light, fun and supportive the next time you seek acknowledgement – sometimes I tell myself I am good enough Lizzie, good enough.  This is like an ‘anchor’ KMCC ® to bring you back to you.  It takes time and will not happen over night.
• celebrate in a way that is a real celebration, something that you would not normally do for yourself or something that you know is special for you.  It does not have to be huge, it could be a bar of chocolate, new crayons, paints, a coffee, time out.

Muse of the month

From Jill Badonsky’s book, 9 Modern Day Muses and a Body Guard.    As time goes on I will be introducing more of the Muses through here, my web site and face book including Jill’s web site.   KMCC ® is a registered trademark of a model of Creativity-Coaching designed by Jill Badonsky, M.Ed., with added elements from Dr. Robert Maurer and his book One Small Step Can Change Your Life the Kaizen-Way.


On your behalf I have chosen (randomly) Marge Muse – haha.  She so encapsulates both Jill and Robert’s teachings.  She is the Muse of okay, now-lets-get-started!


The Muses are aspects of ourselves that can support and help us.

• Marge is very much into using small, small steps, no matter how small and just get started that’s it.   This can reduce overwhelm, procrastination.
• Small steps, really mean small, small steps, 30 seconds, 5 minutes, day dreaming about whatever it is you want to do, maybe preparing a place or time for it and just starting.
   
• So I guess she would be suggesting that you don’t get hung up about blaming others, just start to notice how much you can acknowledge yourself, even if it is once a week.
• You may choose to acknowledge something so simple, eg making a cup of coffee, tea, a sandwich, being creative, anything.  This can introduce you into the feeling and that is all you need to do for now.
• A good way of getting started to do anything is just to ask a small question and see what happens.  If the answer does not appear straight away then don’t try to force it.  I promise you it will appear some times without you even realizing.  If you don’t know where to start a simple question maybe, what’s a fun place/way to start ….?

So this month if you are struggling with anything, overwhelm, procrastination, self sabotage, just think of Marge Muse – okay dokey, lets just get started, one small step, even 5 mins a day.  


Creativity

The creative process is as a spiritual one therefore connecting with who we REALLY are, our intuition, our child like aspects that are often are shut out as life happens.

Often creativity is not valued or prioritised.   We frequently don’t appreciate just how valuable and essential it is to our existence and the sense of being alive.  We may be creative in terms of painting, writing, etc or cooking, gardening, having fun, playing, at work, in the home.

I am looking forward to developing my blogs and with each one I hope that I can some how encourage some fun way of accessing yourself whilst acknowledging the amazing human being you and I are.  We are both ‘human’ and ‘ being’ and so meant to connect to ourselves.  Our higher, intuitive, fun selves.  The more we look after ourselves physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually, I promise the ripple affects are incredible.

It does not matter how slowly you go, so long as you do not stop.  – Confucius

To interesting times ahead

Liz Gow