Liz Gow - Life Coach, Occupational Therapist

Small & Crappy - Reality Check

2012-01-30T11:24:00.001+13:00

This is my amazing husband, John, who really at times is so wise and ALWAYS honest. I have to say that truly we laugh like this a lot. I have to admit that on this particular occasion it was encouraged by alcohol and a birthday celebration.

I wanted to write a blog and this week it was about personal life coaching. I was struggling because I have one hour and could have done this 2 days ago when I planned. I thought about Rae Wardes' gorgeous statement that is well know in the Kaizen Muse Creativity Coaching community - 'make it small & crappy' it will be good enough. Ok I will, I think. Then what about, so I approach John. "What would be something you would like to read that would inspire you around personal stuff?". (He really could be a coach himself and an OT for that matter - haha), he could not really think of anything. Ok then, "What is something that you are struggling with just now?" He still could not think of anything.

I was beginning to feel as if he was not trying hard enough (cheeky eh! For sure!)and with that thought it hit me. He was outside in the middle of sweeping the path. It is a lovely sunny day, I had interrupted him to ask these questions because I could not answer them myself. He explained that all he could think of was the garden, he had noticed plants growing that were new, wanted to transplant something to see if it would work and discovered 3 pots that he wanted to use in some way, and I wanted to take him away from this. He looked so content and relaxed.

He was so in the present and enjoying every moment of it and thank goodness that he allowed himself to be, stay there. What a wonderful reminder of how to just be and you know sometimes, we just need to stop figuring it all out. I have done a lot of that again just recently and really hearing that there so needs to be a 'time of just being of taking a break, taking stock of what is already working with the power of gratitude which will create new inspiration without even trying.' This is from Lull Muse - KMCC, what fab advice.

Get It
I was struggling with something and trying to get someone else to help me. Absolutely nothing wrong in that what so ever, unless you are taking them to a place where they really don't want to go or need to go. I was thinking that I really wanted to write an inspiring, useful blog where 'small & crappy' would have been just fine and ok to do. Had I done this then I would not have approached John, on saying that I am so pleased that I did. Great role model.

Got It
Now I know that what was really occurring for me is the need to want to write a blog in a hurry. What I got out of this is so much in terms of learning. However it still was about writing a blog and it being good enough.

Great - options/choices

remember small & crappy
good enough is good enough
make notes along the way of ideas
take risks with blogs

Ta Da! - Credit report - acknowledgment

I stopped myself in my tracks when I noticed where John was
I recognised that it is up to me to create what I want and take responsibility of that instead of trying to take someone out of their place into mine
I wrote this blog and enjoyed its integrity
I love small & crappy - it is so freeing
I am letting myself of the hook for being late with it
I actually like writing blogs, don't know why, don't need to know
I learned from this in a loving, compassionate way, nice lessons

How will I celebrate

Post this blog
Read it again - haha
Go out and enjoy lunch with friends
Relax and have the rest of the day off

Wellbeing & Mindfulness

2012-01-22T07:32:00.000+13:00

I have been attempting to be mindful and develop my wellbeing for quite some years. Always a working progress, please remember that.

The other day, well I was not really owning up to how I was really feeling which was like this little dude. I was trying to be all mellow, chilled, I have to walk my talk, right!. Well nah, not happening. I was ready to take anyone out, well slightly exaggerating for effect but seriously that hammer was ready. I was surprised why I was feeling that way, using my poor head, which definitely was not mindful, present. I was in the past, the future, reminding myself that I should be grateful, blah, blah, blah. Oh I did try to get present and do some breathing, focus and nah!

And then it hit me, not the hammer! The meaning of mindfulness, being present. It means with ME, no matter what I am experiencing. No where does it say it has to be for only pretty emotions. Ah! Not that I wanted to go here I certainly did not and honestly the more we do this the better. So I decided to just sit in my agitation, whatever it was and be with it. And I did. I used some Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) Techniques. Just got this a previous post;

I allowed my thoughts to be and tried to let them pass on a cloud which worked for me this time, last time it was on leaves in a river. I really did accept that I will continue to have thoughts and tried to let them go peacefully, and not judge if I don't manage that. Did not manage totally but certainly made a big difference.

I did sit with my feelings and breathe (know this happens quite naturally - sorry had to put this in again, it makes me smile - I am easily pleased)

I tried to breathe and notice the breath - 3 - 5 times, trying to enjoy it and I did

I did connect to the feeling, and breathed into it, made room for it

I did not try to change how I feel, although it felt uncomfortable, but thats all

I did not try to make it ok, well, just a little bit but got back to not making it ok

I did accept that it was there and it started to feel better already, just stopping the struggle, I guess as ACT would suggest, switching off the struggle switch.

Then I asked myself these questions;

what shape is it?
is it moving?
is it solid, soft, heavy, light?
what colour is it?
what temperature is it?
where in the body is it?
how is it feeling?
as suggested noticing the breathing and just sat with it

Honestly it really did help. Later I went for a walk, which was brilliant. Now I have to say that the walk alone may have worked, being outdoors, by the ocean, in the garden is so powerful and just being with nature.

I guess overall it was a great reminder for mindfulness is that it is about being present with what ever appears and honestly the thoughts and what we attach to them are far worse then the actual situation.

How would it be to give the techniques above a try, even if it is going for a walk or being in nature. Enjoy

OTcoach - Kaizen Muse Creativity Coaching

2012-01-13T09:24:00.000+13:00

I feel blessed that everything I do is informed by Occupational Therapy, in terms of purposeful, meaningful, holistic, environment, support structures etc. Having just read the Kawa Model, which was a hard read for me, however the model itself I feel is useful in terms of grasping the 'unseen', which for me is what being human is and how we are influenced. It would be surprising if my life was not affected.

I have learned so much about people, what matters, we are all different, have different perspectives and yet experience similar challenges, no matter who we are and what we have achieved. This has become more apparent since I have been coaching, about 6 years now. Results Coaching Systems started me off on some very powerful strategies, training about communication and processes.

I started to wonder why am I noticing people more in coaching when I thought I had always noticed people. I am in the people world. What I realised was when I am in the OT role, not so much now but it still happens, I was getting so caught up in my role, the impairment, disability, goal that I often did not really see the client. I believe what I did was ok and seemed to support the client, mostly, not all the time. I think the Kawa Model can help with this more obviously now.

In coaching you go with whatever the client brings with them. You never know what will appear and your role is to listen, hear, ask the gorgeous curious questions, not for your insights but for the clients and then, well coaching occurs. This kind of occurs a little in supervision and of course is different because there are a whole host of other aspects/factors that enter the room/space eg client etc.

Over the years, as an OT, coach and supervisor I have noticed and have mentioned on numerous occasions the importance of well being and mindfulness, which implies balance, etc. Added to that now for me the concept of wellbeing (great, I have my next wellbeing blog when it comes around) is creativity, no matter what form.

What also informs my life and OT is the coaching approach because of the curious questions, believing a person has what it takes, they know what works for them inside and the belief simply in the process of being human and experiencing all emotion and giving space for the person to be (always a working progress).

As mentioned I feel blessed and now after 3 and a bit years I recognise just how much Kaizen Muse Creativity Coaching can assist OT's to not only connect with the client but more importantly themselves in a realistic fun, powerful way. When people have been on this journey, magic happens they become who they are meant to be and honestly these ripple affects in all aspects are tremendous. So I have decided that I would like to introduce all the Muses from Jill Badonsky's 9 Modern Day Muses and a Body Guard, one in each blog, I will rotate themes every 5 weeks.

Jill was an OT and more importantly is herself, an artist, creator as we all are. She has been able to capture aspects of life which matter and some how in her gift to us has created an approach, which is tangible, fun and are realistic ways of encouraging us to raise our awareness, embrace all of ourselves, nourish, have compassion, support with our focus, work through perfectionism, sabotage, overwhelm, procrastination with small beautiful steps from Dr Bob Maurer. I believe this is a gift and want to share that too.

Each OTcoach blog I would love to share a Muse and apply him/her to some aspect of you, which will take cognisance of how this may be applied to you, the clients and perhaps peers. The more we listen to ourselves, experience who we are, express ourselves in what ever way, emotions, fun, creativity the more we will succeed and achieve the life we are meant. There is something about OTs and coaches, they believe adamantly in supporting others to LIVE a meaningful, purposeful life no matter what the challenges are and we can do that for ourselves, why wait to have an illness, injury, life threatening situations. Why not do it in wellbeing?

A quote from Audacity: Muse of courage and uninhibited uniqueness

"If you are not having fun, reconsider what you're doing".

"I don't know the key to success,
but the key to failure is trying to please everybody"

Bill Cosby, comedian, actor

"Courage is doing what you're afraid to do.
There can be no courage unless you're scared"

Eddie Rickenbacker

Wellbeing, MIndfulness with Natural Resources

2011-11-13T20:45:00.000+13:00

It never ceases to amaze me just how refreshing and easy it is to be outdoors. I look down from our balcony on to an amazing fern, which happens to be a favourite of mine. Just looking makes me sigh, take a breath in and sigh again. That is all it takes.

We have a beautiful country here and are so lucky to be surrounded by such beauty and space. I am passionate about many things and one of them is about being outdoors, just being mindful of where you are. It does not matter how small the green area is or where, even if you cannot physically reach it, you can imagine it and if this hard then you look at a picture, the healing and clarity it can bring is profound and even more profound than that is that you really do not have to even try that hard. If you can even for just 5 minutes give yourself permission to either be in it, day dream, look at a picture and just breathe the effects are so rewarding.

The other day I was a little overwhelmed and could not think. So instead of reaching for another cup of coffee or nibbling through dark chocolate Brazil nuts, I went out and did some weeding. I was really quite busy and went out. Have to say that there were battles in my thoughts - what you don't have time and guess what I made time and guess what, how much more clarity did I have just being out there and how much better did I feel? Another guess what, truly how much more effective was I?

I would really encourage you to consider connecting with the outdoors in some way, even for 5 minutes, a walk, a stroll, feeling the breeze by the ocean, even a walk around town in a way that is a stroll and notice say the sounds, you will be surprised how many birds you might hear above the traffic. Even just strolling and breathing in a relaxed manner will make all the difference.

I am doing more and more coaching outdoors for wellbeing and mindfulness. Even if it is hard to actually be there, we have wonderful imaginations and pictures to help us.

Connecting - OTcoach

2011-11-06T19:38:00.000+13:00

I returned from the occupational therapy clinical workshops. The theme was not specifically about connecting yet this was the underlying theme and was both quite strong and core. Having qualified in 1995, this is the first time that I have felt that such a strong connection is needed and required in our Profession.

I would have to say that I was so amazed and inspired by OT's from all different aspects and loved all the workshops I attended.

What an incredible bunch of people. Even the people who were not doing workshops but I was lucky enough to spend a short time with, blew me away. What I noticed were the themes of working smarter, leaner and the consideration of Wellness and Well being. Loved how this was just organically mentioned in workshops as a passing comment, recognising it's importance. This is my mantra as I have witnessed so many times it's impact on people.

Below is a TED talk, which initially I thought was a bit whoo whoo, but I figure well I like this and it speaks to me and maybe it could support someone else in a reminder of how lucky we are and just how much power we do have. If just a few more of us grasped this and honored ourselves and our journeys and had compassion for how we all got to where we are right now, what a difference there would be to the energy in general.

I am so aware that so much is changing and there are so many people out there. Our Profession is amazing and I love the workshops as they showcase people and their passions. When you are in the presence of passion, in a way that people want to share so that we all gain, develop and enjoy then what a difference.

Amazing video - worth the 10 minutes - I promise - about connecting, being present and noticing - gratitude.

We are in an incredible Profession that is based on core, ethical shared values of respect, meaningful and purposeful lives. We so need to do this for ourselves. We truly need each and everyone of us as a collective to celebrate our differences and take responsibility of our owning and having honest communication, well being, looking after ourselves and permission to live the best life ever.

Enjoy the video

Body Talk - Body Trust

2011-10-30T12:08:00.000+13:00

I have been looking for a silent retreat for sometime The other day I learned about a silent retreat that occurs for 10 days straight and involved meditations, no journalling, no books, constantly being with our own being. Wow, that is something that appealed to me, um but 10 days.

I had these heavy feelings in my body. I actually verbalised that it made me feel scared to be totally with myself for 10 whole days and no contact with anyone, husband, friends etc.

For the rest of the day and the following morning, I had this constant heavy feeling in my body and head. I kept thinking negative thoughts about myself, "I am not good at being with myself, if I am walking my talk then I need to do this." My head was telling me I was a wimp, a phony. I kept telling myself that I could face my fears, I knew that it would be good for me and yet some how my body continued to not feel good at all.

I spoke with my husband and finally a friend who asked, "What is your body feeling?" Heavy I say. "Where are you feeling this?" In my tummy, chest and throat. "Do you have any feelings of excitement?" No, just heavy, dread. She simply mirrored back, your body is letting you know loud and clear that this is not what she wants. As soon as she said this I had an instant feeling of relief. I could not believe that I was judging and comparing myself and trying to be led by my head instead of trusting my body, intuition.

Get It - what is really happening, what is the issue
Finally after chatting, journalling and actually part of this was doing nothing/space. I realised that I am listening to my body. I heard the messages straight away and even voiced them, however I did not trust my body/intuition. My head got in the way.

Got It - ok I now I have got it, what are my options

Consider alternatives
Have compassion for needs in making choices
Buddhist Centre
Google silent retreats for 1 - 3 days
Create one at home - 1 - 3 hours
I can start small - 1 hour, maybe 30 minutes

Great - choose an option and do it

Have emailed 2 retreats
Have phoned Buddhist centre
Have emailed a friend to see if she would be interested in trying a silent retreat in my gorgeous room from 9 am - 12 noon
I will do 3 times a week 15 - 30 minutes meditation, silence

Um - what might get in the way, overcoming road blocks

have compassion and do it anyway
know that I am learning, a beginner so 1 - 5 minutes is good enough
for me I will put in a time in my calendar
actually I have been learning an on line/conferencing call meditation course with the lovely Beverly Beiling and can use her strategies anytime
remind myself why I value you this and what I hope for
remind myself how I feel when I am in the silence and after

Get To List - I get to;

after this do a 15 minute meditation that I learned with Beverly
diary another 2 times, Wednesday and Friday
I may treat myself in between - feel like it will be a play date with myself
choose different locations - outdoors and indoors

Ta Da List - what I can acknowledge myself for

writing this
seeking support
being honest with myself - eventually
having compassion for myself

What am I grateful for

my goodness so much, for today, right now, writing this and getting clarity
making time to give myself 15 minutes
having lovely home and garden to go explore
having a husband and friend who are really honest with me
hope that this helps someone else

Question
Are you going through something right now and confused between what your head is saying and your body/intuition is saying. How would it be to ask yourself a couple of questions;

If I did not care what others thought of me what would I do?
If I did trust myself, what would I do?
Do I feel any excitement, butterflies or am I just feeling all heavy?

Then please reward yourself. Maybe Get it, Got it, Great may help. Good luck.

Don't Make Life Weight - Launch

2011-10-24T21:35:00.000+13:00

Finally I am launching this coaching programme on Thursday 23rd September 2011 by doing an introductory workshop. It is has been developing over the last 5 – 6 years. I guess though really it has been developing even longer than that. You could say I have been researching it for many years in a sense.

There will be 4 follow up coaching sessions either for small groups or on a one to one basis. I truly feel that this coaching programme can make a difference. There is no quick fix for sure but truly, no one needs to be dieting or trying to change the outside of themselves. Often we have been doing this for years and is it working?

We all have what it takes inside of us to learn to accept ourselves for who we are and know that we are good enough. I am convinced the more we connect with our bodies, listen to ourselves, not the head bit but truly ourselves, do things that matter to us because of our values, because it brings pleasure, laughter, use ourselves as a guide not do what we think people want us to do, the happier we will be and the ripple affects are amazing. I have witnessed it so many times since in my role as an Occupational Therapist and a Life Coach.

This workshop will explore influences on body image, body trust, health at any size, focus on a goal, an aspect of life other than ‘ideal’ weight or changing the outside of you. I have taken this journey in so many ways and know that we are all different and that is what makes us unique.

I am so passionate to share what I have learned and know that only you can create what the life that you deserve but there is a much kinder way of doing it, so simple and challenging but all possible and real. This approach is about you being independent and not having to rely on anybody or product. We can live a more happy, which means experiencing our full range of emotions, fulfilling life according to who we are. I am so excited about this and hope you join me on this exciting journey.

Not Perfect - Don't Make Life Weight

2011-10-24T21:28:00.000+13:00

Wow, how grateful am I to not be perfect! This would not be written if I was still caught up in that. Have to say though that I am definitely I recovering perfectionist. I do now recognise that it can be extremely valuable to have high standards and also just has damaging or for me paralysing.

I am so loving being imperfect from our training, Kaizen Muse Creativity Coaching we have the perfect Muses to call upon - Bea Silly and Spills - being child like and allowing mistakes, lowering standards, to hey get this - good enough. Good enough for whom? I really think that is a good question. Good enough for whom?

So I challenge you in the mean time to consider how many times have you done something for someone else because you wanted their approval instead of valuing who you are. I wonder how much these aspirations affect how much you want to change the outside.

Trust me, please hook up with Bea Silly and Spills for even just 5 mins and if you allow yourself permission you will connect will you even for a few moments and have bliss. The more you do this the more you will want it again. Just one small, a wee step.

A word from Bea Silly KMCC (R) who encourages that you connect with your fun, inner child without judgement! How can you make whatever you are doing fun today?

Spills KMCC (R) "The greatest mistake a man can make is to be afraid of making oen." (ha, seriously that is a genuine spelling mistake - going to just leave it) - Elbert Hubbard, publisher, author.

How would it be to lower a standard today or purposely do something badly - go on I dare you and if not, oh well then - ok. Learning to connect to your bliss helps us learn to connect to our bodies and our real needs!!

Mindfulness - The Breath

2011-10-24T21:24:00.000+13:00

I love this picture for so many reasons and today it is because of the focus and presence of the child trying to capture the enchanting bubble, nothing there nothing but absolute focus and delight in what the child is doing, being totally mindful and present.

No concerns about whether anyone is looking will think bad things, no question of am I doing this perfectly, is this ok!

I am writing up my coaching programme about connecting with the body and am realising more and more that connecting occurs in so many ways. I have some fun ways, interesting ways. I attended a workshop this weekend, which was fantastic - Mindfulness - Acceptance Commitment Therapy (ACT), which really is all about being mindful, reminding ourselves of our values, being guided by them, learning to acknowledge that our thoughts are thoughts and we can be with our feelings, we can be whole.
The beginning place is simply breathing and noticing the breathe in your body and if that is hard to do then just count the breathe, on the end of a breathe is one, even repeating that 5 - 10 times for a minute or more. Small steps get you there. I promise! When asked to do this, a few years ago, I wondered and asked why does this matter. A few years down the line, I wish I had come out of my head and carried on with the breathing. It is immensely powerful in connecting, pausing and being. We then come from a place of calmness and not anxiousness.

There are so many other benefits and strategies but for now, breathing, taking time when you eat. Noticing the textures, smells, tastes, sounds, smells. Just simply noticing, in an incredible start and then notice how you feel after.

Mindfulness

2011-10-24T21:20:00.000+13:00

This seems to be a buzz word or concept at the moment, which has been around for thousands of years. It is around now for me because I am learning more and more. Although this is definitely about breathing and meditating it is much more. Following the last 2 weekends where I attended ACT - Acceptance Commitment Therapy where a huge component is mindfulness and the first Positive Psychology Conference, where they talked about meaningful and purposeful lives, activities based on values, as if it is a new thing and there is a whole Profession - Occupational Therapy that has existed since the early 1900's. We do a 3 year degree for it. Anyway, they talked a lot about mindfulness and to be honest I am grateful that science is finally catching up which means that approaches will change and hopefully there will be a much more contented world.

I am using these techniques so much in my work and just amalgamating everything. I am using it on myself and noticing how much more I am enjoying my food. I am being really present to tastes, smells, textures and did not realise just much I enjoyed how food looks. By being more present I definitely am having a different experience that is much more satisfying. The other day at the ACT workshop I was eating an apple and so was my neighbour and we could hear so much of the apple. I know it sounds crazy but it was fun and was definitely satisfying.

Mindfulness can be used in so many ways and at present I am busy and know that the next 2 days I am going to be in overwhelm but I have decided that I can accept that and also accept that it is what it is. I know that I can handle it because I always do. I am committed to be willing to use mindfulness and my action for the therapy bit will be when I get the thoughts, I will just let them run by like leaves on a stream, be mindful, present of my breathing, even just noticing 3 breaths and focus on what I am doing. What a great tool.

So, what is one way that you could be more mindful of something, even if it is your breath 3 - 5 or the texture of the next thing you eat and just notice. Enjoy :-)

Aha-Phrodite - Paying Attention - What Works

2011-10-24T21:15:00.000+13:00

Kaizen Muse Creativity Coaching uses 10 Muses (created by Jill Badonsky - The Muse Is In) who represent different aspects of ourselves and can be our beacon and light to shine the way through to explore ourselves and learn what really works for us.

I would love to introduce to you Aha-aphrodite, she is really pretty cool and I have called on her so often because one of my needs are that I often don't pay attention to what works. She is the Muse of paying attention and possibilities to awaken your passion for creativity, for life. She invites you to capture and savour your inspiration.

Often when we have spent many years trying to change the outside of ourselves and focusing on what does not work, we become so focused on these aspects that the negative takes over, which I have to say is actually 'normal'. For whatever reason it is a human trait until we actually just end up choosing something else that works for us. All part of a process and we have to start somewhere. So just know that you are not alone. Truly.

So Aha-phrodite offers, if you are experiencing low self confidence, to compassionately pay attention to how your confidence increases when you keep going. Pay attention to where you are getting it right.

The fact that you are reading this right now tells you that you are certainly keeping going. How many times you have you tried to change the outside of you to try to create the happiness, the life you want? I want to acknowledge you for showing up right now.

So, how would it be to focus on what works, for just 5 mins perhaps, or day dream and/or journal, where are you getting it right. Please try not to focus on weight or weight loss. Can I challenge you to think of between 1 - 3 things that work for you? That may be getting out of bed today, going for a walk, taking time out, cooking a meal, going for a walk, playing. It does not matter as long as it relates to the inside of you, nothing to do with anyone's opinion.

You Get To, if you wish, if you don't, it does not matter! Maybe pay attention to see where you will find inspiration today what is making you laugh today. You could 'Get To' do one thing to celebrate, acknowledge what you have come up with and if you have not come up with anything, you 'Get To' celebrate you and acknowledge you anyway. Go on, I compassionately dare you!

"Only one thing has to change for us to know happiness in our lives, where we focus our attention." - Greg Anderson, basketball player

Alvert Muse - Think Differently - Break the rules

2011-10-24T21:08:00.000+13:00

For some reason this is one of my favourite Muses. I really did not know that Albert Einstein who this is based on was so much fun and accepted that making mistakes was part of life and actually innovative. Don't Make Life Weight, living life from the inside out is not about not losing weight. It is about learning to listen to your body to nourish him/her and to learn what they really love to do and trust him/her in all you do and eventually with all decision making for the life you want to lead. To have fun, connect, enjoy, build resilience and you will handle anything.

For so long when we have been told what to eat, how to exercise, how to be we continue to look to the outside of ourselves to gain approval to see if we are doing ok and doing the right thing. We lose the connection with ourselves with what matters to us. It is hard to know where to start and what to do.

I did a workshop on Friday, it was a small intimate group and I am grateful for that. What I noticed was that I had a lot of material that has been gathered over the years and could be overwhelming. All we need to do is just start somewhere. Just take one notion that is different or that breaks the rules and just try it on for size.

So if you have continually tried to change the outside of you to make yourself feel better, what is one small step could you choose to change the inside, just one small step.

It may be checking in with your breathing for 3 breathes, doing something that gives you pleasure then noticing where in the body do you feel the pleasure, eating something yummy learning that there is no good or bad (actually that is really quite a big step), relaxing, reading, playing, even for just 5 minutes to start with, just showing up with that notion and noticing how it makes you feel and where in the body do you feel it. If you do not know then try to accept the notion that your body will have experienced pleasure also.

Being creative, what ever that looks like is the best way to connect to yourself without even trying and thinking about it. I promise you.

How would it be to revisit your childhood imagination. What stimulated your imagination when you were little? What books did you read? What did you pretend to be? What next?

This could be a small 5 minute step. I just love colouring in, doodling too and colouring in the shapes.

"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle." - Albert Einstein, Swiss-German-American physicist.

Bea Silly Muse - Lighten Up, Make it fun

2011-10-24T20:48:00.000+13:00

How can you not smile when you see this? Actually I must admit there have been times when I have been tearful and that is ok too.

Um, I am struggling with this for some reason, lets not judge Liz and keep going and just noticing. Jill Badonsky suggests that we summon Bea Silly when; you need to re-learn how to play, lighten up, release rigid thinking, and remember how to make your creative expression fun.

You need to remember and re awake to the wonder of being a child and know the positive implications this had for your creativity. You are feeling resistant toward working creatively for one of these reasons; you just don't seem to want to do it. You feel a childlike power struggle inside you. You want to do something creative, but you never actually do it.

Does any of this sound familiar or resonate with you? For so much of my life I have spent endless hours thinking about food, what I SHOULD eat, what I SHOULD not eat, how I SHOULD behave, what I SHOULD do, etc and etc ....... and certainly there has not been much room for creativity, fun or play - I do feel I have made up for that and more I have to add.

"The 'inner child' has been overly explored as it related to the wounded part of us. We also have an inner child filled with joy. We can choose to use either one for our creative benefit."

Living life from the inside out is all about connecting to who we really are and what better way to do this but by being creative and doing something fun, just because we can. I would really like to add just how much we do not prioritise this and yet how profound to our well being and life it absolutely is. When we don't connect to who we really are, just look around at the consequence of that and listen to what fills our head with absolute rubbish that we take on as a belief. So what do you have to loose, absolutely nothing but to give it ago, even for 5 mins.

How about trying to list 20 memories you have of being silly. Do not be concerned if you cannot think of all 20. Your subconscious loves questions and will work on it even when the list has been put away. These moments may then revisit you when you least expect it. If you were not silly, how could you have been silly?

"Be aware of wonder. Like a balanced life - learn some and think some and draw some and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some." - Robert Fulgham, author.

GIGIG - Get it, Got it, Great ... MIndfulness - being Present

2011-09-28T16:37:00.000+13:00

I love getting presents and have only just admitted this in the last 2 years at nearly being 50. How crazy but it is what it is and wonderful!! I have presents every single day of my life, in noticing, being present and gratitude. it is not always nice and sweet but I am still grateful for what I have and who I am, compassionately a working progress.

Get It - What is going on
I am so passionate about well being and mindfulness and it is the topic of the day for sure. What I am realising is that I want to be more specific because I want to facilitate a number of workshops for different aspects so reflecting on when, where and how does this impact on me and what does it mean.

I realised that mindfulness for me initially had a connotation of being spiritual and meditating and it certainly is. I am for sure going to develop meditation skills because they rock and make life much better, enjoyable and sustainable. I am going to explore the different ways being present will affect me. I attended a brilliant 2 day work shop - ACT, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, which I will not try to explain (cannot do it justice in a bee blog but is now part of my practice) but an aspect of it was about being present and accepting of feelings. So this is a challenge for me. So I guess I want to go there, well actually I don't but my body does.

Got It - ok I have it now what are my options

try a technique - there were various
journal it

Really I know which one I want to do

Great - made a choice, action

Ok I really liked this one. Have to put it in a list or mind map (favourite) to keep it simple for me.

Allow my thoughts to be and let them pass on leaves in a river - that will work for me today. Accept that I will continue to have thoughts so just let them go peacefully, and not judge if I don't manage that.
Sit with my feeling and breathe (know this happens quite naturally)
Try to breathe and notice the breath - 3 - 5 times, trying to enjoy it
Try to connect to the feeling, and breathe into it, make room for it
Don't try to change how I feel
Don't try to make it ok
Accept it is there

what shape is it?
is it moving?
is it solid, soft, heavy, light?
what colour is it?
what temperature is it?
where in the body is it?
how is it feeling?

Notice the breathing and just sit with it

Yeah right sounds easy, well actually the steps are simple and hard to do. It is certainly worth trying. I have tried it before and this is not about making myself feel better, it is about allowing it. It was just there, as a consequence I did feel better but it is not really about that. It is about learning to tolerate the feeling, switch off the struggle switch then choose a behaviour, action that is kinder to yourself.

So I am going to do this now - truly. Are you sitting with something that feels uncomfortable, even a little bit. If so, how would it be to give it a go. I would be interested to hear how you go on. I would imagine this stuff takes practice, endless patience and compassion.

Meaningful and Purposeful - OTcoach

2011-09-21T14:30:00.000+12:00

I attended the first Positive Psychology Conference in Auckland on the 9th and 10th September 2011. About half way through the first morning I started to pinch myself and ask if what I was hearing was for real – truly. I was in disbelief and finally had to ask someone if what I was hearing/grasping was indeed correct. I ask someone next to me “I am hearing that meaningful and purposeful lives is a new profession in Psychology and it has only really been discovered kind of now?” “Um – pretty much, this is a new arm to Psychology, a selection/choice of interest.”

So now science has caught up with what we have known all along. I still cannot believe this as I write. Bottom line, Psychologists have empirical evidence, in fact lots and lots of research and figures to back up what we do, ie. creating meaningful, purposeful lives based on values and particularly strengths. Now as an OTcoach I have used the coaching approach to remind the client what is working when obviously at times there is so much evidence of what is not working. I often work on values and interests/hobbies first to engage a client, to assist with motivation etc to then rehab. There is of course no order or prescription but basically this is my OTcoach approach.

Hedonia and Eudaimonia were part of nearly every presentation. Hedonia = emotional wellbeing, gaining pleasure immediately basically, if feeling sad, make it better and in an instant make yourself feel good. Eudaimonia = psychological wellbeing and social wellbeing. So now they recognise that emotional wellbeing is not enough and not sustainable and that in fact we need both psychological and social wellbeing. Is this familiar??

Todd Kadshan is a prominent psychologist in USA and we were lucky to have him on Skype. He was fantastic and apologised to Psychologists in general for saying that Psychologists can assess the clients but, if it is not in context, then it means nothing. OT is totally about context, values etc, etc. Can you imagine what it was like to sit there? I did have moments of basking in the knowledge that we get this and knew this and there is a whole Profession out there that does this.

Positive Psychology really promotes and I am 100% behind them in this, is the fact of our own Wellbeing. They liken it to brushing teeth every day and now find it incredible that we do not nurture our own Wellbeing, we do not need to become unwell before we start to look after ourselves. Of course, being Psychologists they have researched this and have evidence that it affects everything and it should be a priority in our lives. The Wellbeing is of course balance – work, rest, play, mindfulness, dealing with all emotions.

So I still believe that everything I do is informed by Occupational Therapy, even more so now. As much as I was somewhat frustrated that we are not recognised, in the bigger picture I am delighted that finally the concept exists on a much wider scale and in the medical field. It now can impact on so many people that we could not possibly have reached before. I believe to be honest, that my coaching is occupational therapy of the ’well.’ It seems that Positive Psychology is about that too. Of course most Psychologists are working in mental health.

It feels as if we could benefit from their results and use it to remind DHB’s, Government why it matters and that our approach can lead to sustaining health and ultimately could reduce revolving door syndrome and repeated visits to hospitals/GPs.
My dream is that as a whole we as humans can bring wellbeing into our lives, just as we need to brush our teeth and share these concepts with our clients, so they take away tools that assist them for the rest of their lives. The strategies are so simple and yet we find it so hard to give ourselves permission.

So I challenge you to just look at your own life/practice and notice how much you look after your ‘wellbeing’. Please ask yourself what are you getting right and what is working and then celebrate.

Interesting times ahead

Excitement Overwhelm - Get it, Got it, Great ... GIGIG

2011-09-14T17:07:00.000+12:00

Get it - what is the real issue
Have just attended an amazing conference, workshop and watched a You Tube video which all speak to me really loudly and resonates so much in personal life and professional life. I feel I have hit on something and I have of course not. I have a lot of energy and making myself feel overwhelm and pressure to share this information with others and consolidate it and use it. Phew.

Fact is I am using a lot of it anyway in Occupational Therapy, Supervision and Coaching, which is a great confirmation. So what is my issue. What is that I feel pressured to do?

Got it - now I know, what are my choices
I have it. I am so excited and have all these feelings in my tummy, I want them to stop and I am concerned that I will forget stuff.
Options

be mindful of my feelings, use ACT to sit with them
treadmill for 30 mins
eat my through
drink wine
get lost in You Tube
watch a TED video that is always worthwhile
play games on the computer
remunerate about it and do nothing
bore my husband with it
write a list/plan of where and how I want to share this stuff

actually - I have written up notes
wrote an article this morning
informed a couple of people already

Need to give myself some compassion and enjoy 3 lovely slow breaths in and out - there done, feel better already.

Great ... I get to

watch a lovely DVD 2.30 mins of lovely scenery and music
make room for my feelings and breathe in to them
make a plan on the new on line Ta Da lists
then definitely have a glass of wine

Um - what might stop me

distraction
eating instead of being - haha
not wanting to sit with good but uncomfortable feelings
procrastinating

Great ... what can I do to over come the above

just do my plan without thinking and judgement

Ta Da

I am so pleased that I did this here
Feel a bit vulnerable sharing my experience but hope it helps someone else
Glad to see how I can sabotage myself sometimes and ruin something that is really fantastic and exciting - wahoo
Love the breathing - kind of handy

Celebrate

Glass of wine
Enjoying beautiful video and music
Just being
Will give myself a gold star - literally in my gratitude note book

What worked - Gratitude

Writing this, not judging
Putting things in black and white cannot believe what I have achieved already
So grateful to have experienced the above and share it

So my challenge or enquiry to you. Can you think of a time that some really cool happened and you were overwhelmed with how you were going to deal with it. Try GIGIG and see if it could work for you.

Environments - OTcoach - Occupational Therapy

2011-09-04T09:38:00.000+12:00

Person Performance Environment, is such a huge concept for OT. Now I just consider it as part of my practice, creating meaningful and purposeful lives which obviously involves the environment - right! I was reading a book called Mood Mapping, fascinating. It is all about noticing what mood your are in and managing it. Dr Liz Miller was a brilliant neurosurgeon who experienced bi-polar and this book describes how those who suffer from a mood disorder can apply her technique successfully to cope with 'life'. I had it on the shelf for quite sometime, which was sent to me by an awesome OTcoach in the UK, Jen Gash.

She describes just how important environment is, not just at work but at home. The need to have space, some where that is calm, not cluttered, peaceful and safe. I am fortunate that I have a room to work from like that but I hardly ever use it for myself, to just go sit there for a few moments, minutes to just be, time out and yet the rewards would be profound. There is of course out doors, nature, so many wonderful places, especially here in NZ.

I wonder how many of us have access to an environment that is conducive to our needs, even if only for a few moments. If, we do not have that then perhaps we can create our environment from within and not rely on the outside. We can do this and easier then you think. Through mindfulness, day dreaming. We can be at traffic lights, in a busy queue, in a business meeting, in front of someone who is anxious and we can create our own internal environment from where we can practice, breathing, pausing and then choose our next action rather than being reactive.

I wonder how many of our clients are in a chaotic, noisy environment, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that but could we teach them strategies to create the calm, steadfastness of a peaceful inner environment when they may need it. Um, just interesting. I wonder what your environment is like? Do you have somewhere there that allows you to connect with who you are? Does not have to be in an intense meditative way, just somewhere, inner or outer that supports you to be. Try it, the rewards are amazing, just starting even with 5 - 10 breathes, right now! Just notice your breathing.

Its ok to not feel ok - Get it, Got it, Great - GIGIG

2011-08-29T19:53:00.000+12:00

Have not yet titled this, not sure what is to come, only that I feel, what I feel that I am having an off day. I feel bad today about having an off day. My life is amazing, I love it. I have a great husband, relationships, l love what I do, my home etc so does this mean I am ungrateful because I am having an off day. No I don't think so. I can still be grateful for my life and feel like this - right!

Get it
Ok I get that I feel like I should not feel like this because of some old script somewhere, because of positive psychology, because, because I could blame so many things but I feel the way I do and that is ok.

Got it
So now I get it. The Got it is what can I do about it now that I have identified it. I could beat myself up, drink some more wine, eat some more almonds, not the same as cheese cake but I don't have any, write this email and accept what I am feeling.

Great
Guess what I am going to choose to get through - go get some cheese cake, only joking had 2 glasses of wine so will just finish this and my wine and it must be bed time.

Ta Da!

I wrote this, not knowing what was coming
I did not drink and drive for cheese cake - I would not anyway!!!!!! Joke eh!!

What worked

Wine - I know that is so transient but it is working
Writing this

What am I grateful for

My goodness writing this
Having no more wine - work tomorrow, so responsibility
My life is pretty cool
I never give up

How will I celebrate

No more wine
No cheese cake
Definitely no more almonds
Sleep would be bliss - good night, don't let the bed bugs bite - how gross is that!!!

Nite, nite

OT Rocks - Occupational Therapy Coach - OTcoach

2011-08-13T21:36:00.000+12:00

OT rocks!

The pieces are finally coming together. I feel as if I have come full circle with occupational therapy. Having practiced in various roles for 15 years and therefore meeting so many different people, not only clients, but carers, staff, agencies etc., I have learned so much about life and really get that we are all different!! I had not always appreciated that and I did not treat people differently, especially in the earlier years I was so focused on trying to help the client and on occasions was led by diagnosis. I know this is all part of learning. My first role was in mental health and I must admit to this day I believe it is a great grounding and training for interpersonal skills and seeing the person despite the diagnosis.

When I first came to coaching I loved it and it took some time to know what exactly it was that I loved. I know I left feeling enthused about OT again and started to use the enablement and communication skills in all I did, which was noticeable with clients, colleagues, in supervision and generally. This still was not enough though I really still could not grasp exactly what was happening, one day it clicked, well after being part of an international OTcoach SIG, noticing and journalling.

The coaching approach comes from a strengths based model. Much of my training with Results Coaching Systems covered aspects that we covered in our training. I started to also see that I was no longer treating people as if they were sick and needed fixed, which I know is a bit of challenge in our field, that is why we are there!!! I also noticed that in actual fact the type of questions that a coach uses are designed to elicit answers from the person. How would you like to see it? What brings you pleasure? What makes you smile? What matters to you? These were on top of looking at function and purposeful activity, meaningful perhaps in terms of well I need to cook, clean, dress, drive etc but not meaningful in terms of self and here’s the thing. I can honestly say that I have only just really grasped that over the last say 3 – 4 years.

I am also a Kaizen Muse Creativity Coach, we have many tools that I use all the time but one of the biggest aha moments of my life (I have had many!!) was just how much connecting to the self is the key to everything. We are encouraged to explore with a client ways of using creativity, could be aspect at all, gardening, cooking, painting, drawing, writing, sewing, does not matter as you know but for me some how I had this profound aha moment of realising that purposeful and meaningful did not necessary mean functional in terms of ADLs, work, etc. These are of course hugely important to a person’s life but for me I had forgotten the creativity in me.

I then started to change my approach with clients asking them the above type questions. It was clearly obvious at times that dressing independently was definitely a goal or driving etc but I sometimes don’t start there. I start with a leisure activity, an interest, something that is not so focused on functional stuff. What I have found is that a person often, not always can connect to who they are and still are despite a disability, the barriers, once this occurs it seems to have made the rest of rehab more tolerable for a client. They have a balance and can experience pleasure in other ways. One client had a dense stroke and his spark was that he could still love his grandchildren, he was still granddad and they were a part of his rehab – amazing.

Part of our role is to focus on deficits because we are there to facilitate change and/or compensatory methods, adaptations etc, so coming from strengths based model, such as focusing and reminding them what is working, is much more of a balance. It is of course not that simple or easy at but our training lends us to look at the client as a whole, fantastic.

I have also used both coaching approaches in supervision, particularly the questions and balance, checking in with supervisees about what they do for fun, for pleasure, how do they look after themselves in and outside of work. It certainly makes a difference.

The other day I had another huge aha moment, only about 3 weeks ago. I know that I am passionate about OT and kept wondering if I am that passionate how come I want to finish clinically, which will be August 2012 but continue in supervision, supporting students that are not in DHB environments, be part of OT. Through a coaching session with the amazing Jeanette Isaacs Young I realised that everything I do is informed by Occupational Therapy, everything, especially my coaching.

My coaching is all about the person, really getting to know their values, who they are to then support exploration of meaningful, purposeful activities because with out a doubt it leads to meaningful and purposeful lives. I have been working like this as a coach since being certified with RCS but had not really appreciated that I was coming from this angle so much until I did KMCC and after receiving coaching (various coaches), being mentored and mentoring. I also encourage greatly balance, taking time out even for 5 minutes, experiencing all emotions, recognise what cannot be changed, change what can and really know the difference.

If this is not OT then what is? Honestly this was quite a revelation. I shared this with my husband, guess what I said everything I do in coaching is actually occupational therapy in the ‘well’ world. Far out! Well to be honest I used different language but how fantastic. I had just accepted what we do and it is so ingrained now. I love that I have this and have embraced it. I just think that coaching is such an awesome modality for OT but OT rocks, truly it does.

So I emailed our Professional Advisor and told her that I did want to finish clinically but I would be dedicating some of my coach practice to OT. That I am passionate about OT and believe in the profession. It was no surprise to her or the OTcoach SIG of my desire to support others to reignite their passion, their creativity in what they do, find balance, build resilience and live a life according to who they are. To do this for clients and themselves. I will develop a couple of packages re coaching approach but also about balance, small steps, dealing with overwhelm, perhaps bring some creative tools for OTs. I definitely want to create a one day re-treat.

So this may or may not work, it really almost does not matter, what matters is how I feel about it and to share it if I can but if not to live it and know that I am so grateful for what I have. I feel so blessed to be able to supervise and will always do this. I have over the years gained amazing stories and inspirations from the clients I have worked with. There have been so many that have changed my life. They are people just like you and I. I want to always remember I have a person in front of me.

Well what a beginning blog for OTcoach!

Getting What You Want - Get It, Got It, Great ... - GIGIG

2011-08-07T19:55:00.000+12:00

Wow, getting what you have longed for for so long should be an amazing feeling right! So why am I feeling the way I am just now. I am delighted that I am going to launch my workshop, coaching programme. Cannot believe and just feel so lucky, so then how come I feel well like this. Not sure what like this actually means or is but it feels unexpected, a little low, flat, the energy and excitement has certainly been there and will be there but I am trying to be with my feelings which I can eat or drink away but don't want to do that.

It seems strange now that it has taken me so long to allow myself to do this. I am a coach and could have done this a long time ago, cant you just hear those little critics but I am here now and I am doing it. Sometimes I get sad thinking about what we do to ourselves over our lives, just because we don't feel too great about who we are inside and then we continually seek approval from others and you know the rest you will never please all of the people all of the time.

Amazing that we don't give ourselves permission to listen to ourselves. Have to say I have been developing these listening skills for some time now and they are much better then they were but sometimes I choose not to listen because then I may need to face up to the fact that I am an ok dude for just being who I am. Not for any great deeds or anything just because it is supposed to be this way. So what am I getting???

Get It
I guess I am getting that even though your dreams are being realised there is a balance of emotions, feelings, fears, excitement. Perhaps with the gains there are some losses but how wonderful to be moving forward and be true to the self despite the critics in the head.

Got It
I think my Got It is just honoring that I have a mixture of feelings from realising my dreams of Don't Make Dreams Weight, living life from the inside out and its ok to have them. My choices are to listen to myself, have compassion, know that even though I may have some 'flatness' it does not mean that I am not totally grateful and so excited. I could eat my through, drink my way through or I could just breathe, journal, cozy up in my wonderful warm bed and sleep on it.

Great ...
That is what I am going to do, my Get To list has one item on it, just cozy up in my lovely warm bed and sleep and be grateful, ok 2 things. How lucky am I?

My Ta Da List

wahoo writing this and not knowing what was to come
honoring how I am feeling and attempting to suspend judgement
not trying to think of anything else to add - haha

What worked

being honest and not trying to analyse it too much
making time to be here

I am so grateful for the people I come across, friends, family, clients, life. Thank you, thank you.

Feeling Wrong Because It's Right - Get It, Got It, Great - GIGIG

2011-08-01T07:28:00.000+12:00

We all make mistakes or do stuff that is wrong, incorrect, not right and will continue to do so because we are human. Here's the thing I noticed this morning, well actually I have noticed on many occasions but I got my 'Get It' this morning. I have overwhelming feelings that something felt wrong, like I did something wrong or just a feeling that was uncomfortable as if I should not be doing what ever it is.

Then I realised it was because I am doing much more for myself that is in my best interest for sure, one of which is launching a new programme that I have been working on for years - Don't Make Life Weight, Living Life from the inside out. This is a really big deal for me and I have a date 23rd September 2011 to finally put it out there. Even though this is brilliant for me, I have these feelings this morning that I am doing something wrong and in a sense I get it that perhaps to my old self I am. Aha, I now have my Get it!!

Get It

I get that I feel off balance a little because I am doing something I have dreamed of for years and it is scaring me, exciting me and putting myself out there. My old self, old beliefs about myself, old coping mechanisms, self sabotage are screaming out at me, no you cannot do that. You will get hurt, make a full of yourself, no one will turn up, who do you think you are that you think you can help others, the old script. So to her, it would feel wrong. So this is the her who comes from a lower scary place, but the one that comes from a higher scary and exciting place absolutely knows that this is in her best interest. So it kind of makes sense. Crazy eh! But not so!!!

Got It

Ok, so now I Get It, what are my options. I could learn to sit with my uncomfortable feelings, journal, talk about it, not do it (definitely don't think so - although maybe this has been part of why it has taken so long!!), feel the fear and excitement do it anyway. All of these seem OK options but I am doing it - the workshop. I need a small step, really something small. I am feeling overwhelmed already and more so when I read.

I could just accept or try to accept that what ever I feel is led by my thoughts and habitual thoughts. I think I just want a very small step and just acknowledge how I am feeling will do for me I think at this time.

Great ...

So what will I do. My Get To List will be:

Acknowledge that I have noticed this and have compassion for myself.
Know that the more I do what matters to me and I love then I will continue to feel a mixture of uncomfortable feelings and excitement, which means I am right on track.
Keep moving ahead with the workshop regardless of how I feel.
Congratulate myself on this insight - did not know what was coming until I wrote this.

My Ta Da List

Writing this honestly as a journal.
Still feeling uncomfortable.
This is real, cannot wait to do the workshop.

What worked

Writing this

What am I grateful for:

Being able to journal.
Stepping into who I am meant to be.
Slowly getting that I will not always feel comfortable with the things that matter but knowing that this will always be a regular feature because I will continue doing and being who I am and this seems to be a feature of being human - Fright and flight response.

I wonder if you are dealing something similiar. How would deal with it?

Bliss - Overwhelm - Get it, Got it, Great - GIGIG

2011-07-27T08:19:00.000+12:00

During my journalling this morning I felt overwhelmed and a little stressed, thinking of all the things that I had on today and consequently started to work on my automatic thoughts and recruited small steps but it was not until I saw what I was busy with that I realised I would be in my bliss for the whole day if I allowed myself to be and was reminded just how much I could have not allowed myself to be present.

Get It

I get that I was feeling overwhelmed and stressed because I had a busy day. It was not until I looked at the content of my day that I realised that I would be:

Doing a Wii work out which I love
Coaching which I love
Supervising which I love
Being supervised which I love
African drumming which I love

I am absolutely serious I love all of these activities, so even with one I would be in my bliss and because I had a full day I just saw the busyness. My supervision and drumming are by a wild ocean, beach and 1 hours drive away, so 2 hours return but the thing is, I get pleasantly blasted, refreshed and usually sing or listen to CD's there and back. How easy it could have been for me today to have missed this.

Got it

Right so I get it and the got it is what can I do about it. What are my options, well I could ignore my bliss and just stay overwhelmed. I could accept in wonder what a great day I have ahead of me and that by being present I could really enjoy and be grateful for what I have, which is of course my option.

Great

Now doing it. So I will once I have finished this look through my list and then hop on to my Wii and get on with it.

We play Djembe drums. The picture above is of a 10 minute gig - love saying that in a rural town, community, just loved it. I am in purple and white at the end on the right hand side. Have to say the purple and white is no longer. it is purple and purple after my dear hubby put the top in with the new purple trousers. Now I am very purple at drumming gigs. We are of course amateurs but great to beat on a drum. Love it.

Seriously, how lucky am I.

My Ta Da List

I journalled and gained some wonderful gems
I am in my bliss, now writing this
I get to do what I love all day

What worked?

Being open to doing my journal and really allowing myself to see how it could have been.
Having compassion that I was not initially grateful

What am I grateful for?

Giving myself permission to journal
Being able to let my thoughts flow
My life and how much I have what I love in it
It is worth going to the uncomfortable places

What's In A Name 2 - Fitting In. Get it, Got it, Great ... GIGIG

2011-07-10T12:29:00.000+12:00

I was looking for puzzle pieces to depict 'fitting in' and then looked at my own logo!!

I did not expect to be here so soon but realised as I did the mind maps what I love is my passion. I also started to realise that I was just trying to fit in with my peers, my profession, what I value, wondering how can I develop a business from my passion, so many things were affecting me and I was losing my way. I have no doubt that the above will have some impact on what I do, however I am trying to make the pieces fit, when they dont necessarily do so at this time and may never.

My tag line is living life from the inside out and why let life be a puzzle, together we can make the pieces fit and that has always been about identifying the right pieces in the first place. Our pieces, what matters to us from the inside not the outside and with every essence of me I believe, truly only then can we really be living the life we are meant to be living.

I also strongly believe that we have to do and be in the doing and learning to 'be' we learn about ourselves and experience what works for us and what we no longer need. Interesting that it is so much easier to support some body else through this.

So - Get It

I Get that what is most important at this time is I remind myself of what matters, what my values are. What inspired me to want to be here.

Got It

Now I have more insight I have some options; I can do another MM of who I want to be in coaching. How I want to spend my life from here on in, nearly being a 50 year old. Explore my values again. Act as if the whole world was my oyster, which it incidentally is. MM as if it was a blank sheet.

Great .. My Get To List

Ok, I am going to do values exercise purely because it is fun and light hearted, ok then it will bring me back to me. I will then look at a blank sheet and act as if I could not fail.

My Ta Da List

I allowed myself not to be perfect and edit that last post to include a Ta Da List.
I am here pondering.
I am open to learning.

What worked

Trusting and giving in a little to having to have the answers now.

Celebrate

Picnic by the beach, even though it is pretty cool.

What's In A Name - Get It, Got It, Great - GIGIG

2011-07-10T11:26:00.000+12:00

This is driving me crazy. I am keen to be a life coach and at the same time coach in Occupational Therapy. I have tried to amalgamate the two names which is really not describing what I do. I knew this would be a challenge but honestly I did not realise just how hard it would be. What I am beginning to realise is that there is so much in a name. Your identity, what you stand for, who you stand for, your values, etc, especially if you are trying to explain what kind of work you do, and if you want to attract the right kind of person and what I mean by this is that when I have a name and/or describe what I do a person will understand that and expect that when they contact me. I still do not have the answer and right now feel paralyzed so I have decided to leave it right now and perhaps this is highlighting for me, not what I really want to be called but what is it that I really want to commit to and be known for that.

Get It

What I get right now, is that I dont get it and that is frustrating and I am surprised that I feel so stuck.

Got It

I Got that I Get that I dont know. So where to from here? Ok options are to explore. I dont think exploring the name is what I need to do. Mind map what it is that I really love about coaching. What is it that I hope for from coaching. How do I see this integrating in Occupational Therapy as a coach supporting other Therapists, the Profession. I know that I want to be amongst people who want change. I am also very strongly interested in working with people with disordered eating but wonder if I have the capacity for that.

Great ..

So now need to make a call and choose just one small step or several but I think one small step. I choose to start with a mind map about what I love about coaching, actually and will do one about my passions. What am I really passionate about.

Why Make Dreams Weight - Still waiting to see if it is ok to use the name!!

2011-07-06T15:42:00.000+12:00

I had this notion that I would be organised with this blog. I named it and then committed to it weekly, although it is not a week yet and am realising just how much I have restricted myself. I really want to be a good blogger but more than that I want to learn about me and how I have been using the tools that I have learned over the years and also to follow the journey.

At the moment I have been part of Reciprocoaching, which I think is a brilliant idea and I am grateful to be a part of it finally. Anyway, I am been coached and at the same time you coach someone else. No charge apart from a modest annual feel. You also learn about research, participate in supervision and mentoring which I have yet to do.

I today as one of my actions actually booked a room to run my first introductory workshop. Yeah. I cannot believe after about oh 5 - 6 years I am finally allowing myself to launch this programme, which originally was called Get it, Got it, Great. As a coach, I do believe in walking your talk and have found it fascinating just how much easier it is to believe in some else then yourself but of course in reality you can only really go as far as you have been and I want to do this for me but also because I want to broaden my experience and understanding to absolutely enjoy my life and share with others.

I have coached 2 ladies in the last couple of days and honestly, even in supervision I have constantly been blown away with who people are and what they do to themselves and for themselves. They are truly my teachers, inspiration and enthuse me and empower and energise me. You never know who is walking by you. How amazing and lucky are we to walk along so many people who are just regular folk!!!

So I am going to allow myself to be a beginner blogger and look forward to learning from you guys. I will do a weekly GIGIG and blog when I feel the need. Any suggestions please let me know.

Childhood Gifts - GIGIG

2011-07-03T15:06:00.000+12:00

My first real blog for Get it, Got it, Great - GIGIG
Get it
I was working through a self coaching work book by Janet Whitehead - her website is called Mud and Musings, inspiring and fun, worth checking it out. It was about exploring your gifts as a child and explore where you are using them now and how could you use them.

My goodness I was not prepared for what occurred. As for most of us I do not have many childhood memories. I was a little resistant to doing this to be honest, which actually indicated that I needed to do it even more. Don't you just hate that!! I was able to vaguely recall that sometime before I was 5 (and why 5 because I remember the street we lived in) we put on a street play and sold old toys to raise money to buy new ones. I loved singing, musicals. I was in a couple of plays and embarrassing as this is I use to narrate my brother and I doing the dishes.

As an adult I wanted to train others or present. On occasions I wanted to do drama, learn to sing, play the guitar and never followed any of this through. I remember hearing messages about who did I think I was to stand up in front of others and do stuff, teach them etc. I always wondered why I had this thing inside of me that I wanted to teach, to do groups, workshops, present etc. It is very big headed you know!!!

Anyway in my coach practice I love working on a one to one basis but I am really drawn to work with groups also, do presentations, workshops, retreats etc and could not understand what this draw was but now I do. So ..

Got it
Now I get it so what. How can I use this information well, I get that I finally understand that I have had this gift, knowledge before I even went school perhaps. That it is part of who I am meant to be and that is so ok and must be exposed. It would be a shame if I did not allow my gifts (don't know how much they are gifts yet) but I am naturally drawn in this direction, so I need to satisfy who I am. How absolutely wonderful and scary at the same. Jeez people are going to see the real me that is emerging but it feels so right.

Now a strategy, what do I 'Get To' do that will support my next step. Well, I can acknowledge this and have to say I need to journal and sit with the part of me who is sad because I denied this my whole life (next year I am 50) and thought I was a bad person because I wanted to support, teach, educate others, do presentations and workshops, etc and yet is ecstatic that I am listening to my intuition.

Next I can continue to develop my workshop programme for September and a workshop for November. I also want to do a retreat. Now Liz, these are way big steps albeit exciting.

Great - what next

Small step - I Get To take a note of my ideas and put them on my board
I get to continue to work with my workshop for Sept
Calendar to start my November workshop in August/Sept
Be kind and compassionate to myself - what an insight

My Ta DA List

Finally allowing myself to be heard
Allowing my uncomfortable feelings
Doing this blog

What worked - not thinking too much and just doing.

I am so grateful that I am in the space to face this.

Oh how will I celebrate. Open a 200 ml bottle of sparkling Lindaur Fraise wine. :-)

Now your turn - if you are up to it!
Get it - what did you love doing when you were a child? List, mind map, collage, doodle, write, paint, day dream etc. Where are you doing it now? If you are not doing stuff you enjoy now, can you choose one small thing?

Got it - now you know some things you like to do. What is one thing that you can choose? Just one thing? List what you need to do to create the time, space, resources to do it. Just a quick list.

Great - now what, just choose one item from the list. You Get To Do - what ....? Just one small step, even if it is for 5 mins, or day dreaming, just do it.

Ta Da List - write one thing on your Ta Da List, just one thing that you are glad that you did, more if you feel like it.

What worked?

What is one thing that you are grateful for?

How will you celebrate?

New Beginnings - Get It, Got It, Great ....

2011-07-03T14:33:00.000+12:00

Well it has been quite some time. I cannot believe just how long to be honest. But I am glad to be back. I have been pondering, exploring who I am and what rocks my boat. I took a month off, well kind of to explore my spirituality and creativity and have to say it was not what I had expected but extremely worthwhile, which over time I guess will be part of this blog. For now though I just want to say hi and gently bring myself back to blogging.

My intention is to do a weekly blog. I listened yesterday to a pod cast by Goddess Leonie, seriously you should check out her web site. What an inspiring woman and generous. Her web site is http://www.goddessguidebook.com/. Anyway she spoke about how she reached others and explained that mainly blogging was consistent, so here I am.

Since about 2005, I have been writing a coaching package called Get it, Got it, Great.... It has evolved over the years and now will be called something else. However, I really like what was behind this so am going to trial using it in this blog. I will start with my GIGIG and then ask you to explore your GIGIG. I would be interested in any feed back or ideas.

So
Get it - really means, identifying what is really bothering you, what is your dream, really being specific, only needs to be a really small thing or can be larger.

Got it - you now know what it is so you can develop a strategy to get what you want, it actually could be just a small step to just get you on your way, in fact the smaller the better because then you are more likely to do it and many more. You may have a list of options and choose one, take a small step from that option.

Great - is the Get To, instead of To Do. It is the action, you Get To - whatever it is.

I will be encouraging a Ta Da List - which is acknowledging what is working for you, where are you getting it right, what did you do that you are glad you did. It may be one or up to 3 things.

I have a little note book and write in it daily - a Ta Da List but also, one thing that worked and one thing I am grateful for. I promise you I award myself with a star sticker or a smiley face - try it, its fun and works.

Undermining Self

2010-07-23T11:49:00.000+12:00

Why would someone undermine themselves - well I discovered that this is what I had been doing and surprised that I had. My understanding so far is that I wanted to be accepted and liked I guess by a team I work with. I also wanted others to feel valued for who they were (and probably to be accepted and liked) and would make enquiries that were perhaps unecessary. I kind of knew the answers sometimes but anyway. Not good reasons.

Consequently I have disempowered myself and now they believe I am probably less able than I actually am. No one's fault just my own. It has been difficult and uncomfortable to discover this but I am so grateful that I now have this awareness. So I have journalled, spoke about it in supervision, with my husband, drawn about it and now blogging.

It seemed strange to put my value back it the hands of someone else. It is funny because also I am working with a client who is dying and know that perhaps on occasions I have got a little too close or emotional but see this as normal and do express my emotions. What I did not consider is that some people in the team 'don't do emotions' and therefore have had concerns that I may not be coping!

Again not anyone's fault but my goodness it has been useful for me to be reminded that although my own beliefs are about attempting to be genuine, authentic, honest and transparent does not necessarily make it right to express that if others around you have no concept of that might look like for me and of course only have their own experiences to draw on and therefore make assumptions on that. They also of course will need to protect themselves.

I am grateful that this is caught 'in time'. This has probably been around all along I have just woken up to it - haha. So my solution is to be my true self, respectful of others and myself and compassionate. We can only be what we have experienced and sometimes we forget that we are not all the same. We are all trying to do the best that we all can.

So a question for you - Can you think of one occasion where you have underminded yourself? What did you hope for by doing this? What was the outcome? How did you feel? Ok more than one question.

Muse of the Month

So today I have chosen - oh no, dont believe this - Marge Muse (KMCC (R)) is around again. She can be around when we are feeling overwhelmed, in resiitance or procrastinating. Ok her personna is about now lets get started, with absolute compassion. Just one small step lets just start. She encourages you to develop habits. You only need spend 5 - 15 minutes a day to create a habit that serves you. She is extremely supportive and believes in you and will remind you to just take a breath, one small step and you will get there, just keep going.

Ta Dah! Lists

These are credit reports that remind you just how much you are getting right and can be developed as a habit/ritual each day, even if you just think of 3 - 5 things, if this is hard what about just 1 thing. Often we easily recall what did not work without having the balance. Most of the time when you consider what worked you will probably find that the positives far out weigh the negatives. Try it!!

* What is one thing that worked for you today?
* What is one thing that worked for you last week?
* What is one thing that you can acknowledge yourself for and celebrate that?

Get To List - if you choose, You Get To:
* Complete the questions asked above.
* Allow Marge Muse to help you when you struggle, just hear her say "okay dokey lets just get started, just one small steps, even 5 mins."
* Choose a creative activity or something you use to love to do as a child and play, just for 5 minutes, longer if you feel like it.
* Remind yourself that you did what you did with what you knew did at the time!

"Eighty percent of success is showing up." - Woody Allen

Self Acknowledgement - Part 2

2010-06-07T18:08:00.000+12:00

This will be just a short blog because the second did not link into the web site, face book as it was meant to so this is just at attempt to see if this will work.

Just a thought about why it would be worth acknowledging yourself. The other day I realised that I was pushing away a person that I really liked, respected and had fun with just because she was not meeting my need of telling me that I was good enough.

I had not appreciated my feelings of how much this affected me and I felt hurt and let down by the person, who poor thing was totally oblivious to this of course. Because I did not want to hurt her and tell her how I was feeling because I felt foolish so I just started avoiding her, which is silly because I really enjoy her company.

So I went on to think about what was occurring for me and what had changed. I came up with the insight as mentioned above and now I see that. I genuinely have given myself compassion, am extremely grateful for the learning and can now practice acknowledging myself so that I dont push away people that I care about.

This gives me great motivation to get my stuff together, with absolute compassion and know that I have so many teachers/mirrors out there, that if I dont get it this time I will the next.

Ta Da! List :

I will credit myself for allowing myself to see this
I will congratulate myself on not beating myself up
I iwll acknowledge that I am absolutely good enough and getting better at doing this

I Get To :

I will celebrate by contacting this person and arranging time together

Ok this will do for me now. I hope it is useful to someone else.

Blaming - Self Acknowledgement

2010-05-30T11:54:00.001+12:00

I am learning about writing blogs and so will be changing formats. I am beginning to understand that some people like to read lots of narratives and others don’t. So here goes, this time I am going to use more bullet points and see what happens. I really want the blogs to be informative, useful, and authentic.   The basis of my coaching is Kaizen Muse Creativity Coaching ®. I will be using terminology/tools that are based on this approach and whatever I think will work.

Blaming – Self Acknowledgment

Interesting Stuff!

·        If you feel frustrated and annoyed at someone, just check out that you are not feeling this way because they have not behaved in a way that you wanted.

·        Some times we seek acknowledgement from others to validate what we have done or how well we are doing. If we don’t receive this then we can feel frustrated or annoyed at a person without realizing why. It is not their fault, they have done nothing wrong.

·        If you are doing this, firstly please have compassion for yourself and know that you are doing the best that you can but now you have raised awareness. This is a starting point.

·        Often the people we seek acknowledgement from we presume that ‘they have everything together or on to it’ and therefore, not human and don’t have human needs, just like the rest of us.

Ta Da! Successes

Congratulations that you are still reading this.

How about you think about one thing that you have acknowledged yourself for? If this is hard to do consider a small small thing, it may be that you got out of bed today, made a yummy meal, turned up for work on time, played with the kids, did something creative for you, even if it was colouring in.

o   If you can, how did that feel?

o   Where in the body can you feel that feeling? If that is hard to do, just imagine where you might feel it in your body?

o   Notice the difference.

You get To (if you feel like it)

notice who you have recently been angry with and just briefly explore if that was because you wanted them to validate you and say that you did a good job or that you are a neat person.
congratulate
make up a phrase or affirmation that is light, fun and supportive the next time you seek acknowledgement – sometimes I tell myself I am good enough Lizzie, good enough. This is like an ‘anchor’ KMCC ® to bring you back to you. It takes time and will not happen over night.
celebrate in a way that is a real celebration, something that you would not normally do for yourself or something that you know is special for you. It does not have to be huge, it could be a bar of chocolate, new crayons, paints, a coffee, time out.

Muse of the month

From Jill Badonsky’s book, 9 Modern Day Muses and a Body Guard. As time goes on I will be introducing more of the Muses through here, my web site and face book including Jill’s web site. KMCC ® is a registered trademark of a model of Creativity-Coaching designed by Jill Badonsky, M.Ed., with added elements from Dr. Robert Maurer and his book One Small Step Can Change Your Life the Kaizen-Way.

On your behalf I have chosen (randomly) Marge Muse – haha. She so encapsulates both Jill and Robert’s teachings. She is the Muse of okay, now-lets-get-started!

The Muses are aspects of ourselves that can support and help us.

Marge is very much into using small, small steps, no matter how small and just get started that’s it. This can reduce overwhelm, procrastination.
Small steps, really mean small, small steps, 30 seconds, 5 minutes, day dreaming about whatever it is you want to do, maybe preparing a place or time for it and just starting.
So I guess she would be suggesting that you don’t get hung up about blaming others, just start to notice how much you can acknowledge yourself, even if it is once a week.
You may choose to acknowledge something so simple, eg making a cup of coffee, tea, a sandwich, being creative, anything. This can introduce you into the feeling and that is all you need to do for now.
A good way of getting started to do anything is just to ask a small question and see what happens. If the answer does not appear straight away then don’t try to force it. I promise you it will appear some times without you even realizing. If you don’t know where to start a simple question maybe, what’s a fun place/way to start ….?

So this month if you are struggling with anything, overwhelm, procrastination, self sabotage, just think of Marge Muse – okay dokey, lets just get started, one small step, even 5 mins a day.

Creativity

The creative process is as a spiritual one therefore connecting with who we REALLY are, our intuition, our child like aspects that are often are shut out as life happens.

Often creativity is not valued or prioritised. We frequently don’t appreciate just how valuable and essential it is to our existence and the sense of being alive. We may be creative in terms of painting, writing, etc or cooking, gardening, having fun, playing, at work, in the home.

I am looking forward to developing my blogs and with each one I hope that I can some how encourage some fun way of accessing yourself whilst acknowledging the amazing human being you and I are. We are both ‘human’ and ‘ being’ and so meant to connect to ourselves. Our higher, intuitive, fun selves. The more we look after ourselves physically, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually, I promise the ripple affects are incredible.

It does not matter how slowly you go, so long as you do not stop. – Confucius

To interesting times ahead

Liz Gow

Good Enough

2010-04-24T14:32:00.000+12:00

Well this is my first ever blog. I never thought in a million years I would be writing a blog. What would I say? Who would be interested? What am I supposed to do? I have decided that when I write a blog the one guiding principal will be that it will not be about ‘supposed to’s’. I will write whatever is around for me at the time. I think it will always be about growth, in some way. I think it may always be about observations that we often attempt to do the best we can with what we have, not always but we are human beings.

I absolutely love my life as a coach and have realised over the years that in fact I think I was a Life Coach even a child. I recall that I was always trying to fix things, well you will know that a Life Coach actually does not attempt to fix things, we are about supporting you accessing your own inner resources and wisdom. Anyway as a child I do remember with my family, suggesting things and asking what would they like. I think I guess I was a bit of a pain as a kid. I had this feeling that there was always a way through. This does not mean to say that I did not grow up without fears, negative coping mechanisms, low self confidence, self esteem and negative beliefs, just like most of us. However, what I know having experienced various modalities of therapy, workshops, creative therapies, training in various aspects related to work – Occupational Therapy, supervision and since 2005 3 events of life coach training and more creative therapies which I love, and oh the most effective learning of all being a human being, is that there is always potential.

Often we have so many signs and symbols right before our very eyes of what is not working for us but more importantly what is working for us but often we see more of what is not working. As humans I believe that we kind of know if we are not really living our inner, core beliefs, values as we just don’t feel fulfilled, happy and as if there is something missing. Our bodies often speak loudly to us and we just don’t hear. It may be our beliefs about our bodies, ill health, stresses, negative coping skills, something will tell us that we are living connected with our values and what really matters to us. How many of us have done things because we want to be liked, belong? The only way we feel we can gain value is from someone’s acknowledgement and how many times has this lead to further decline in our self esteem and confidence as the only person that can truly value ourselves is ourselves.

I have been extremely privileged over the years to witness some incredible changes in people who really learn about themselves and increase their self awareness about who they are and start to access their potential. It can be done so subtly and gently. This does not mean to say that it is comfortable. Often we hold on to old stuff because, although uncomfortable, it is comfortable as we know it but it certainly does not mean it is right for us.

My aim for the rest of my life is to support people to learn to trust themselves, to feel good enough no matter where they are or what they are doing. They do not have to be in a high paying job, work their fingers to the bone, be a size smaller, be the right colored skin or say the right kind of things. Goals are wonderful but if they are because we want to be liked and it is not really who we are, then we will never be good enough. Today I am good enough to write this blog. It is not perfect, it will not gain favour, I am not attempting to please anyone. I truly believe in my heart and soul that once we can really get that we are good enough we can live the life we truly are meant to live and in this magic happens, we achieve far more than we could have ever imagined. I promise you this, if you start looking after yourself more and take responsibility of who you are, life will never be the same, it will be so much better. Um, I could go on, surprising once you start writing. Well this is my first blog, I am not sure how to end and I guess I just offer two questions. Is there anything you are doing in your life because you think you should? Is there anything you are doing in your life because you want to? Oh, my other aim in life is to continue living a life of balance, that is fun, has creativity to connect to our inner child/intuition and share with family and friends. We are so meant to have a good time and need to laugh more.